Category: Articles

We all have days when we just can’t be bothered; we don’t want to eat, or shower, or answer the phone. We just want to stay where we are and mostly forget about the world. Decent self-care comes with self-awareness – there’s only so many days in a row we can stay in bed, watching Netflix and eating crap, and still honestly say ‘we’re just doing what we need to do to look after ourselves’. Obviously, the number of days will vary by individual and situation, but to look after ourselves, we need to be honest in acknowledging when we’re in an unhelpful routine. Sometimes these slumps hit after we’ve taken on too much and ‘burnt out’, sometimes we actively resist looking after ourselves as a form of self-punishment and devaluation. Some of us even neglect our self-care because we honestly think that we’re coping, with one decent meal a…

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Let’s face it… It can be hard for people practicing kink to find a therapist who is not only going to be accepting of our degree of participation in the lifestyle, but comfortable hearing about some of the things we explore, and how this activity works with our mental health. Many of us have sought help at one time or another but find ourselves unsure how much we can tell them, and fearful that potential disclosures could lead to judgement, or even the loss of that therapist. It’s part of the lingering stigma we deal with in this community. Therapy isn’t cheap, but it’s an investment we make hoping for a great pay-off. It’s really important to invest in the right person for you. You don’t have to pay to be fearful of telling a traditional, straight, cis-male, full of Freudian wisdoms, about your love of masochism. In fact, there are therapies available that aren’t dependent on the tradition ‘talk’ methods eg….

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